A Typical Day

Yesterday was a long day for me. I left home at 6:45 a.m. to go to my paid employment, then headed to my “second job” as Mom’s caregiver at her assisted living facility. I didn’t get home until about 8:30 p.m.

Somehow, in spite of me reminding the AL staff, Mom missed her weekly appointment at the on-site beauty salon. This is happening so often, it frustrates me. Her room is only a few doors down the hall from the salon, and yet they can’t manage to get her there for a standing appointment? She won’t let them wash her hair when they give her showers (because she doesn’t want to lose her set), and the beautician is only there one day a week – so unless I take her out to a salon, now she’s going to go two weeks without getting her hair washed. It’s a small thing in the grand scheme, but it’s aggravating.

Her blood pressure has been higher than normal the last few days and she still has the edema (swelling) in her feet and ankles, despite some extra doses of Lasix. She was shuffling along even more slowly than usual as we came back from the dining room. I spent a few minutes talking to the facility administrator about these concerns, then spent some time installing her new phone and getting her to practice answering it.

I noticed a faint urine smell about her but her clothes appeared clean and dry. It took me almost an hour of gentle nudging to convince her to use the restroom and change her Silhouettes panties (by Depends), which sure enough were wet. Once she got her pants off, though, it was easy to convince her to change into pajamas. I did my usual sweep of the room, tossing dirty clothes into the hamper and laying out clean clothes and a clean pair of Silhouettes for the morning.

I read her daily devotion out loud to her and we talked a little bit about it. We also talked about her sister coming to visit in a month. She was in good spirits.

Overall, it was a good day. Just long. I can’t imagine how I’d manage if she lived with me! At least I could come home, put my feet up and have a glass of wine.


5 thoughts on “A Typical Day

  1. While we were talking on her new phone, I heard an announcement about an event, so I asked if she wanted to go. She said no. The announcement came on again and I caught something about “it’s a nice time” so I asked what it was. She said it was for a spiritual hour (something like that) but she had never gone. I wonder why?

    • Oh, darn it! I meant to ask them to try and bring her down for spiritual hour, but I forgot. It’s only once a month and I think it might be one of the only things they do there (besides dancing) that she would really enjoy. She won’t take the initiative to go to activities on her own, but she’ll often go if someone comes to get her.

  2. I LOVE being at in-home caregiver for my fiancee, but it only works because Vermont pays in-home family caregivers enough to keep going… And because the house is paid off… And because we have family support, both physical and respite care… But the privilege is that we can still maintain our life as a couple, really making sure she gets where she wants and needs to go, and that when she smells like it’s time to freshen up, the only chain of command is between me and my rocking chair.

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